The Vampire Show

At dinner tonight, Motley and I were talking about the blogger radio shows. I told her that I’d been joking in Fab’s chatroom about doing a Vampire Show. She actually thought it was a good idea. She said she’d be on it. Well, she also said she’d be on Fab’s show. Should I tell him? LOL

Personally, I don’t think I could do a weekly show. I mean, wouldn’t I run out of things to talk about? I could go the route of guest hosts and guests who write vampire fiction… but I’m still skeptical. Eventually, there’s nothing left to discuss once we’ve gone through all the cemetery stuff and all the vampire stuff. Wouldn’t me talking about writing and characters be totally boring? I think I’m boring. I figure I must be, cause it’s not like people are knocking down my door to talk to me.

So, I dunno. People seem interested in the cemetery and vampire stuff. Jason X over at the User Pool has used my vampire info as a yardstick against which he’s measured his lover Blair, whom he feels is a bloodsucking vampire. Personally, I think she’s more of the soulsucking type, which makes her a demon from Atersilex at the Bar. I guess I’m sorta on shaky ground cause a lot of people aren’t into vamps. Look at my comments. You’ll see a few of those folks.

The other thing is that there are a lot of radio shows already. Aren’t there just too many for people to keep up with now? Who would listen to me babble when they don’t have time for all the more established blogger shows? Motley suggested I have a basic poll and ask readers to vote. You don’t have to comment, but a vote is appreciated. Should I do a show or not? Cast your vote in the sidebar on the right. If the survey says… YES, then I’ll be back with a poll that is more specific about things like when and where and how long and how often. (Not often. As in, not weekly. No. Effing. Way.)

I suppose I should thank Dragon (did I link to the right person?) for being so enthusiastic about this idea at Fab’s chatroom last week. If no one votes or the votes are negative, I’m blaming this post and poll all on her. Heh heh.

One last thing before I go… Motley still hasn’t downloaded the pic of me at the picnic. Here’s a pic taken by one of the embalmers, Christina. In front of me is my beloved giraffe purse. This was pretty much my set company smile. The LOL caption on this pic at the office is: I may be smiling now, but touch the giraffe and you die!

OH! I almost forgot my big Pimpin Friday! It’s Freaky Frakkin’ Friday at Secondhand Tryptophan. Stop by and YOU could win a prize!

Fang Tune

Here’s a little vampire tune from my Imeem uploads. Even if no one else likes it, I think Marty might. He likes a lot of the same stuff I do.

There’s a writing contest at Zanctuary so I’ve been mulling over ideas. I have a lot of older stuff I could rework, but I’m thinking of something new. The idea has been bouncing around in my head all day. I can’t say anything about it or I won’t be able to use it in the contest. Suffice to say that it has to do with an adage.

In other writing news, I’ve been working on The Lexography. My intent is to see if the key posts from the Bar that have to do with Lex can actually stand alone to tell her story. My sense is that there will be too many confusing things because of the other missing posts. We’ll see though. I’ve wanted to tell the story of a girl with fangs without the trappings of the Bar, but I’ve been reluctant to try. This is going to be an interesting experiment.

Motley still hasn’t downloaded the pic of me at the picnic. Today, I’m feeling the burn… the sunburn that is. My nose hurts. My face is kinda red, and there are a couple of ouchy patches on my arms. However, the discomfort was alleviated by the arrival of The Best Damn Button in the Universe! (TWKS) Yes, I received a button from Karl of Secondhand Tryptophan. Who knew that the man had such great handwriting? Seriously, thanks for the button Karl!

I’m on a mission to buy blogger shirts. One per month. I have a Zombies Ate My Brain shirt coming from Blogography. Next up is a TWKS shirt. After that, I’ll probably get a Socially Dead shirt. Then an Avitable shirt, and so on and so on… Eventually, I hope to have an entire blogger wardrobe!

Hope you enjoy the vampire song and if you feel like reading my girl with fangs story, stop on by The Lexography. Tuesday tongue kisses, beautiful people!

Feed Me!

Yanno, I took Karl’s words to heart and I went back to my feed reader. Not just because Karl is the voice of sensibility on this issue, but because I’m really not up to clicking 60 freaking links all the time. Anyway, I’m finding that going back to the reader is annoying me. Well, really several things are annoying me. First of all, Feed Demon sucks at updating. I see a bunch of twats on Twitter with updates and I eagerly open Feed Demon. Nothing. I click on the manual refresh. Nothing. Two hours later, I see Karl’s newest post appear on Feed Demon… long after I’ve gone straight to Secondhand Tryptophan outside the reader. I check Newsgator too, which is synced with Feed Demon. Same thing. Lagging SOBs.

The other thing that gets me with using a feed reader isn’t really about the feed reader. It’s about the sites. Karl went into that stuff about feeds and RSS and feedburners. My annoyances are more specific. The big one is comments. Dave2 and Avitable do comments perfectly. Although, Avitable’s “Subscribe to the comments of this muthafucka” isn’t how everyone should offer this service, it IS the right thing to do. Dave2 has a link on his left sidebar for a comments feed. What’s so special about Dave and Adam, you ask (other than the obvious)? Their links are not comments for a specific post. It’s comments for ALL posts. ME LIKEY. This is so freaking easy a blog baby like me can do it!

Really the last thing that annoys me are all the authors out there who want you to READ them, but don’t supply you with a feed link. This is bad marketing. Some of us read A LOT OF BLOGS. A feed reader is a must when you get over a certain number. Everyone should offer a feed link. But most especially, authors should! I can’t believe how many author blogs and sites I’ve seen in the past 5 months who do not have feed or comment links. I WANT TO READ WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY! HELP ME HERE! I also wanna shoot off emails to all of them, telling them I’ll fix it for them! I would read many more author blogs, and read more frequently, if they all had links to their feeds and comments. It’s so sad that they are missing out on this awesome marketing tool. So those of you without those links, please think about putting them on your blog. I promise to read you more often if you do.

Alright, my little rant is done but the Feed Me part isn’t over with yet. You see, I listened to the New Improved Jester Show on Talk Shoe last night. I wasn’t crazy about the fancy pro app with the chat bubbles. Too busy for me. I went back to the web client and was quite happy. So happy, in fact, that I had the weirdest, most vivid dream about the show and the chat people and a couple of my friends. Here’s how it went:

Jester’s show turned into this big party in a huge mansion. Karl was giving out Secondhand Tryptophan buttons and explaining WJP. Jester was laughing a lot and UMB was making margys and threatening to run naked through the house. Everyone was telling him that wasn’t a threat at all. They wanted to see that! My friend Jen was there handing out chocolate pudding cups. Every time he got one, Dave would go back to the end of the line. (No surprise there!) He must have been worried though because he said he hoped he wasn’t allergic to chocolate pudding. He wasn’t sure he could stab himself with the epi pen…

My friend Greg, who is sorta seeing my friend Jen, showed up at the party then. He said margys were pussy drinks, to which Hilly told him, “Sweet sweet pussy…” In the kitchen, someone had set out a big pan of enchiladas which Greg liked. He told Jen to drink the margys and he’d eat the enchiladas. Dave told Greg, “No pudding for you!” and he took all the pudding cups from Jen. Greg ignored him and asked about the naked gay guy running around. That’s when I noticed UMB had decided he didn’t like his clothes anymore. Jen then told Greg that at least it wasn’t Darrie (who is 6’10”) from Zanctuary running around naked.

Howard was wondering if someone had a camera on UMB. Hellohahanarf was trying to explain to Othurme that she really did have TWO breasts. He didn’t seem to believe her because he kept asking for proof. Jester was so busy with a photo from TSMOregon that he missed UMB’s flashing. He was also praising Talk Shoe and trying to convert Karl and Hilly over to the “light side”. Someone said Mr. Drunkulous was on the phone. Someone was yelling about twats. Someone else was complaining about static and a hush fell over the room when a booming godlike voice said, “Macs are for sissies.” I thought Dave and Jester were going to have an apoplexy, but then Hilly said she found the tiara and I woke up.

I think I’ve been listening to too many Blog Talk Radio shows while talking to Jen in YIM. Have a freaky frakin Friday… TWKS!

Ass Kisser

Can you guess who the ass kisser is? Me, of course! I made good on my promise and made Fab a Liz Phair page called “I Love Fab”. See it up there with the other pages? It has Liz music and Liz pics. I think it’s safe to say that Fab likes that page.

So I totally kissed Fab’s ass, but I had a reason. I have been waiting for this Sunday FOREVER. I practiced at Snackie Radio. I honed my skill at simultaneous chatroom and phone convos at The Jester Show. Now, I get to SHINE on Pointless Drivel Live. Um, I may still not be able to do chatroom and phone simultaneously though. It’s all the fault of my piercings. See they scratch the screen on my cell phone so I can only hold the phone to my right ear and since I’m right handed I can’t really type in the chatroom and the phone’s really small, the size of an egg really… ummn… yeah. I’m kinda not good at being on BTR shows and chatting in the chatroom at the same time. I guess I need a Blackberry or a Treo or Skype or something. My Samsung Stripe is clearly not cutting it in the Blogosphere.

Well, it’s here… the day that I am to be on Mr. Fabulous’ BTR show, Pointless Drivel Live. This is a very special day for me. For one, I’ve been waiting patiently for my turn on this prestigious show. For another, I can’t fucking get to Fab’s website anymore and I’m missing all the comments and fun. I’ve been deprived since Friday. (I saw the anal sex picture Thursday night, but couldn’t on Friday morning.) I get a white screen with “done” at the bottom. I’ve cleaned every fricking thing on my machine. I’ve defragged and updated and scanned and I even downloaded Safari for Windows. No Fab. Except in Feed Demon. But that means I can’t leave my scintillating and long winded comments! GRRRRR.

Now, using Safari to try to get to pointless-drivel.com was an interesting thing. Safari doesn’t give me his site, but it does give me an error: Safari can’t open the page “http://www.pointless-drivel.com/”. The error was: “unknown error” (CFURLErrorDomain:302). Googling that error got me nowhere too. I’m gonna email the error to my tech and ask nicely if he can tell me what the hell happened and how I can get back to one of my favorite places on the net. If someone else knows the answer to this dilemma please email me at winter at winterheart dot com. (I’ve tried accessing his site with Firefox 2.0.0.14, SeaMonkey 1.1.9, IE7, and Safari for Windows. I’m on XP SP3 with an AMD Sempron 3400+ with 1 GB of RAM and I have Time Warner broadband. And yeah. I know I need another GB of memory.)

My ass kissing will be in full force at 4 pm Pacific/7 pm Eastern time. Here is the link to Pointless Drivel Live. Be there or be… dead. HEH.

Also, don’t forget to listen to the rest of the Rocking Sunday Radio Talk Block:

Secondhand Karl at 2 pm Pacific/5 pm Eastern with Blogography’s Dave 2. Then it’s Snackie Radio at 3pm/6pm with Pointless Drivel’s Mr. Fabulous, and after Fab’s show it’s Turnbaby Talks 5pm/8pm with a discussion about women. All absolutely riveting shows that YOU should NOT miss!

Happy Three Day Weekend Sunday to those of you who are off tomorrow!

Psst! I’m Pimpin’ Boobage…

Motley’s birthday is today. She is nineteen. If you go to her blog, you can see her boobs. Happy birthday, baby!

Since it’s Friday and I haven’t pimped anything in a long time, I decided I would pimp my friend Jen because she’s cool, and her rack is hot, and she’s single. So welcome to Big Pimpin’ Friday, Indiana style!

My friend Jen writes at the Bar. That’s where I met her. She’s a pretty cool lady. Very smart. Great with a snarky comeback. She lives and works in the Indianapolis area. She has a nice job, owns her own home, and has a dog… a boxer, not some pansy ass dog. There are things about Jen that no man can pass on, unless he’s gay. I mean, really, who can remain blase in the face of cheerleaders like these?

Yeah, she’s stacked pretty good. But the best part isn’t the fact that she’s got a rack that will render you mindless with lust. She’s very amusing. She makes me laugh all the time which means she ain’t boring. I, personally, do not feel that the creator of Alaric Kohl could ever be boring. However, Jen has what, to me, is a flaw. You men will not think this is a flaw. You will think she is a goddess. She likes basketball. *cringe*

Now, I played basketball in junior high and high school, but I never liked watching it. I was always more of a horse racing, auto racing, football kind of girl. Jen went to the Big Ten Tournament. On purpose. She took with her, a male friend of mine from the horse racing sim who is a Wisconsin fan. She spent four whole days living basketball, with only a short time out on Friday for her grandma’s funeral. She even turned on Sports Center when she got home! Now, that is a dedicated b-ball fan, my friends.

So now that you know that she’s into basketball, has a great rack, is smarter than a whip and can wield one on your ass with skill if that is what you like, you’re wondering what the catch is right? I think the catch is that she’s single. Men are afraid of single successful women these days. But I just don’t understand that. Someone needs to help me out here.

This woman has gone on a number of dates since I’ve known her. Men just fade away on her. They peter out and drift off like snowflakes in a high wind. Tell me what the hell this woman is missing? I mean, Hello! I don’t see anything wrong with this picture. If she sent you a pic like one of those up there, I know damn good and well, that you bloggers would have been twatting your fingers off about getting a boob shot. Wouldn’t you?

So, fill my comments with some luv, people. I wanna know why you think single, successful women with big boobs can’t find decent men. Are they all gay? Are they all chickenshit? Do they all want skinny, underfed, designer clothes wearing, air headed, calender girls? What is going on in the world today that a cute woman with a rack can’t find a relationship except with her vibrator?

Jen’s gonna kill me for pimpin’ her, but you know what? If someone can educate me regarding her – and other successful women in their 30’s – lack of male attention, then it will be worth it. Oh, and… *whispers in an aside* if you wanna talk to Jen, send me a twat or an email or YIM. I’ll set you up with her YIM. HEH. I’m just evil, aren’t I? But trust me on this, Jen sizzles. She is soooo not a prude! Okay, I better shut up now before I give her enough fuel to roast me with if she finds out I posted this. Shhhh. Don’t tell on me. She doesn’t read this blog.

Oh, yeah. She gives good presents too!

Now that my pimpin’ is done, I’m outtie. Have a great Friday, people! MUAH!