Ugh

That about sums up how I feel this morning. I might be getting a bug. Or it could just be that my sleep cycle is all discombobulated. Not sure. I do want to shoot Dummy. He bugged the hell out of me last night. I don’t care how beautiful he is, I’m pissed at him. So irked, in fact, that I was dreaming I was in an odd house where the next door neighbors kept breaking in, trying to steal him. When they couldn’t get him, they enlisted all their friends, of whom there were many, to toss beer and soda cans into our yard. In the dream, I was really angry. To the point of calling the cops angry. I had my kid snapping pics of them for evidence. The dream made no sense. I was pissed at Dummy. Why would I be pissed at someone for trying to steal him? I would have given him away at any point last night!

Other than bitching about Dummy, I’m too tired to give you much of anything today. However, I do want to mention the fact that my daughter is in a frenzy of excitement. Concert? New boyfriend? Chili cheese fries? None of the above. She’s saving to go to Warped Tour in Portland. (Don’t ask. I’m still pissed at the kids for this idea.) She and Invincible Morrison, the boyfriend, are apparently back together after a very brief breakup due to his clingyness which is now gone. She does love chili cheese fries, but I haven’t bought her any in awhile. No, she’s excited because I got her a domain name yesterday.

She wants a blog. She’s been working on different name and theme ideas for a short while. Finally, she comes up with something like Sissies Stay Home. Something about being socially dead. I, in all my brilliance, go to ShareArea.com, the registrar where my domains are. (ShareArea.com is owned by Mike Wallace, who is the creator of the horse racing sim where I’m message board moderator. I think after 5 years in the game, and now being made a mod, I can call Mike a friend.) I look up sociallydead.com and it’s available. I IM my kid. She says Ooooooh! I tell her, Blog Name: Socially Dead. Tagline: Life is Tough, when you have no Life. She says, I WANT. ME LIKEY. So at lunch I register the domain and make this:

That’s a banner sized version of the blog header. Now I just have to get the hosting sorted out, enter the nameservers, and wait for propagation time. My kid is so excited her boobs are jiggling. No, wait. Those jiggle anyway. Heh. Once the blog is up and launched, we’ll have a little Grand Opening and I’ll ask everyone to stop by and wish her well with her blogginess.

Okay, that’s all I have for today, other than… UGH. I don’t feel so good. Hope you all feel better than me. Have a great Tuesday.

I Dream of Nikki

I totally had the freakiest dream ever this morning. Usually, my dreams are vague these days and I wake up and thrust away any remaining images, so I can get moving with the day. The crystal clear dreams happen rarely to me now. When I do have one of those dreams, it’s usually about one of my characters or something to do with the Bar. At about 5:30 this morning, I had a very vivid dream about Nikki Sixx.

Celebrities are not my thing when it comes to dreams. I rarely dream about them. I don’t think I’ve ever had a Marcus dream. Well, maybe I did. Once. But this is like the third or fourth Nikki dream I’ve had, and I don’t even go to his website and message board regularly like I used to. It’s been a few months since I read his book and I haven’t listened to the CD recently either. I wasn’t thinking about him at all yesterday. Not one thought, so where the hell did this dream come from?

In the dream, we were at a street fair. It started out with him kissing my cheek with an indulgent smile, apologizing for being late, yadda yadda about the traffic on the 405. Then I’m introducing him to this tall ass guy who was a school principal. I don’t know who the principal was. My kid’s not even in school. The principal gave me an indulgent smile too when I introduced Nikki, saying, “I know who he is. I’ve seen his face on all the kids’ t-shirts.” This guy was really tall too, Darrien tall, like 6’10” or something.

We moved on and I introduced Nikki to my network consultant, Steve. What Steve was doing at the street fair was another weird thing. I mean, maybe he and his wife go to stuff like that, but why was Steve in my dream? The next thing I know, Nikki has his arm over my shoulders as we’re wandering through the crowd and he’s whispering in my ear, “Do you think they believe that I’m your boyfriend?”

“You’re not my boyfriend. You’re older than me. I don’t go out with guys my age or older,” I tell him with a teasing grin.

He kisses my temple. “Now you know what you’ve been missing, dontcha?” he chuckles. He starts nibbling my double helix and I’m getting all shivery. “I love your ear. All those holes and gauges. It’s incredibly hot,” he murmurs. “Hard to resist.”

I’m turning into a puddle, right there in the middle of a street fair! Then some guy, don’t know who, nor where he came from, says, “You know, Nikki left you a present. You’ll have to go back and get it.”

I look at Nikki and he’s got this smirky smile. “You are gonna love this,” he tells me.

I stare at him wide eyed. “I don’t need presents,” I protest.

“Yes, you do,” he insists. “You deserve them, and I need to give them to you. Over and over. So shut up and enjoy.”

The present is this condo with beautiful wood floors and a couch shaped like lips. In my heart, I know I deserve this gorgeous house and that cool couch, but I have this nit picky worry inside me. So I tell Nikki, “Are you trying to buy your way into my heart?”

He laughs and leads me to the bedroom. Along the way, we pass a room with a big window, a zebra printed area rug, and a big black desk with a new laptop on it. “No way,” he tells me, that indulgent smile returning to his lips. “I know better than that! If I wanted to find a way into your heart, I’d let you blow me every hour on the hour!”

I blink up at him. Damn. How’d he get into my head? Then I realize someone from Zanctuary showed him my Confessions of a Blow Job Queen post. I look at the fully furnished bedroom. Waterbed. Giraffe sheets. I am so lost in lust at this point. I look at Nikki and he’s smirking again.

“No more air mattress,” I whisper in awe. I touch the bed and it’s waveless. I sigh. I am so in love… with the beautiful wood floors, the beautiful red lips couch, the waveless waterbed with giraffe print sheets, and a tattooed ex-heroin addict rock star who is *gasp* older than me!

“No more air mattress,” he tells me and pushes me down on the bed. It feels like a cloud. It is sooo wonderful. I moan. Nikki laughs softly. I open my eyes and he’s propped on an elbow beside me, grinning.

“Are you gonna write a song about me?” I ask.

He tugs on a long strand of my streaked hair. “I already did,” he replies. “You and your blog and your crazy internet friends and your deliciously wicked tongue.”

“How’d you manage to work all of that into a song?” I blink up at him, amazed at his talent.

“It was easy. You inspire me,” he says, nibbling on my double helix. “When you’re ready to give up the cemetery and write all day long, I’ll ask you to move in with me.”

If I had been on one of those heart monitors I swear they would have brought the crash cart. And then the alarm on my phone went off. Fucking phone. I coulda happily stayed in that dream for the rest of my life.

Anyone have any idea why I had this dream? I mean sure, Nikki Sixx is hot, but I wasn’t thinking about him at all! I swear I wasn’t! I’m stumped. And left feeling… unsatisfied. I wanted that dream to go on and on and on…

Enough Nikki for now. Here’s the naughty picture I promised you for Friday. We used this at the Bar and put heads on it. Marcus’ head on the male and Kelly’s on the female. When Mary and Shiny see this picture they are going to spew their drinks on their monitors! This has to be the funniest giraffe picture I have ever seen. It’s a good lead in to the weekend. Uh, not that I meant everyone should have giraffe sex this weekend…

Happy Friday everyone! Come back this weekend for some lust and pics of my new purse! MUAH!