The Power of Trust

Today, I have the pleasure of a guest blogger, something I don’t usually do on this blog. However, this author is quite eloquent and an excellent blogger. I’ve watched her grow as a writer and author and I’m very pleased to have her here today. Please welcome Karenna Colcroft.

Probably one of the most difficult things to deal with in a relationship is trust. Not only trusting your partner, but also trusting yourself.

I recently had a discussion with my husband in which he told me that he wants me to get angry. My usual method of dealing with anger is to hold it in till I can’t anymore, then cry to him for half an hour or so about the situation and a bunch of other stuff. He said when I’m mad at him, he’d rather have me start an argument than hold it in.

I trust him. I know if I argue with him, he isn’t going to lash out at me or hurt me in any way. My problem was that I didn’t trust myself not to lash out at him.

So I made him promise that if I did what he needs, he’ll have my back and stop me if I go too far. Not that I can’t control my temper; I just don’t trust that I will.

The fact that I trust him enough to know he won’t lash out in an argument and that he’ll help me with my temper is due to his working to earn that trust. For a lot of reasons I won’t go into here, I have abundant cause not to trust anyone at all. But he knew that going in, and he’s been patient, kind, and caring to a fault, and has gotten past my distrust. He’s earned the right to be trusted.

I think a lot of people have trust issues of one level or another. All of us have some hurt or slight in our past that we have to overcome before we’re willing to let the next person in. Some of us have more issues than others, of course.

My novella Beginner’s Luck started out being about a couple who wanted to have anal sex, so they bought a butt plug kit online to help them. But when I started looking more closely at the story, prompted along by help from Lex and from Mary at Pink Petal Books, I realized it was more than that.

Kyla, the heroine in the story, doesn’t want anal sex just because it’s hot, or nasty, or whatever. She wants to do it to show her boyfriend Alec that he’s earned her trust. Because I speak from experience when I say that being on the receiving end of anal requires a LOT of trust in one’s partner.

So instead of being just a story about a couple who buy butt plugs, Beginner’s Luck became a story about a woman who had a lot of trust issues to overcome, and the man who found her worth the effort to help her overcome them. It isn’t a story about sex, it’s a story about the power of trust.

Though there is some pretty hot sex in it…

Beginner’s Luck is available through Pink Petal Books.

Karenna Colcroft

The Thing About Love

Later this week, on the 7th, I’ll be over at Cindy Jacks’s blog talking about love.  It’s February, so people tend to wanna talk about those tender emotions.  I write about them all the time because my books and stories always have a happy ending.  I’m the kind of person who has to have a HEA (happily ever after.) Or some sort of happy ending at any rate. I don’t want to read about the angst without having it all work itself out, handing the hero and heroine a reward.

In real life, things don’t always work out that way. In my life, the angst has always outweighed the HEA. I think some of us are meant to have to struggle. Very little in my life has come easy, ergo I learned to appreciate the hard won victories.  Things mean more to me if I have to work for it. I tend to hang on to people as long as I can, try to work out issues, try to give them what they need and want, try to keep and nurture the love I have. But sometimes, no matter how hard you work, love still slips away. I’ve lost a lot of people in my life so I prize the ones I have right now. I know that our hearts seem to be the regenerative type, and if we lose someone today, later on we’ll find someone else to love. Still, I’d rather not have go through that again. I just want this HEA to work itself out NOW.

Someone I’ve known and loved since I was 17 years old (I’m not sure I should tell you how many years that is… but it’s more than thirty LOL) did a nice thing this week. He told the readers of his blog about me and sent them here. I think most of his audience are mommy bloggers, which I’m so not. After all, Motley (Nikki) is twenty now and I don’t think she ever called me Mommy anyway. *wink*

Anyway, David told people about me in a little post that exposes some of the framework upon which my heart sits. It felt strangely timely to read his words about my past and feel the connection to my present. You should click THIS and hop on over to see what he said. He was probably my first real love, first real lover, odd as that may seem since he’s decidedly gay. But back then we were just kids, beginning to work our way out of the teens, learning about emotions and sex and a host of other stuff we just really had no clue about. The piece of my heart that David owns is just one of those things about love that we can’t exactly quantify. It just IS.

I must need a sweet, sexy Marcus today. Something to make my old heart pound.  I used to think about my Bar characters a lot more than I do now and thinking about my signature character Alexandria and her mate Alaric always meant that I had that image of Marcus in my head. I miss Lex so I think maybe I need to a write a post about her. After all, she lets me use her name on my books, the least I could do is visit her once in awhile, eh? So here’s my Marcus for today, all sexy and smokey-eyed.

Don’t forget to come by Cindy’s on February 7th to see what I have to say about that thing called Love.  Also, don’t forget that Marty and I have a new release filled with spooky stories. You can pick up Weirdly 3 at Wild Child Publishing.

One last thing… go give my pal Tess some love. Her book Latin Rhythm is scheduled for release on the 4th but the buy link is live NOW. Her cover is probably the best cover I’ve ever done.

Wishing you all a very wonderful Monday!

Cupcakes!

I am not here today. I am over at Snackie’s World trying to figure out if I can eat the cupcakes on her tree. Hmmn. That sounds like a euphemism for something sexual, doesn’t it? You should totally head over to Hilly’s and see if it is a euphemism! After all, I do kinda have a rep for writing naughty things so you never know what I might have in store for…

Have a great Sunday!

I’d Fuck You

Pssst! They’re back. My characters from the Bar. They like coming here and hanging out sometimes when I’m busy. And lately, I’ve been busy writing at the Bar. Last time out, Carlisle and Lex guest posted for me. This time it’s Weylyn. Try not to drool too much. *wink* BTW – “were” is not were… it’s WEAR. Short for werewolf.

Woah! This is much different than I’m used to. I mean, I play bass in a band. Usually, I’m up all night sleep all day. Or in my case, fuck all day. I’m just your average every day were-horn dog. If it has a pulse and excites me in some way, I will fuck it. Tall, short, fat, thin, male, female. I don’t have a preference. They just have to engage my interest in some way. Brainless groupies aren’t much my thing any longer, so if you’re beautiful, but you don’t have a thought in your head that is original, move along.

Now, I will be the first person to tell you that I will fuck anything. Truth be told though, I won’t. A person has to draw the line somewhere, right? If you’ve got an STD, take a hike. Werewolves have a keen sense of smell. I can smell the clap a hundred yards away. And if you’re stupid enough to try to get with me when you’re diseased, I have no qualms telling everyone in hearing distance why I won’t fuck you. Sure, that’s spoiling your fun for the night, but I’d rather protect the innocent than let you get your rocks off infecting people.

Another thing that’s a turn off is dumbasses. Asshats. Oh, and mean girls. Believe me, everyone knows when they are one of those, they just choose to act as if they aren’t. So if you are one of those, and you come on to me, you are asking for a major set down. I will put your ass in it’s place so fast it will make your ego spin. I don’t like to waste time that could be spent getting off, playing music, or eating. So don’t piss me off and waste my time hitting on me. I will make you sorry that you did.

Groupies and sycophants annoy me. Why do those people insist on thinking that just because I’m a musician and I like to get laid, I am stupid enough to fuck them? It’s frustrating, I tell you. Being a sexual revolutionary does not mean I’m stupid. I am smarter than the average were. Never underestimate me.

That reminds me, never underestimate the power of my charm either. You’re afraid to fuck me because you’re older than me? I will make you feel young again. Worried about fucking me because I make more money than you? We’ll eat at McDonald’s. Concerned that you’re not attractive, that you’re too short, too bald, too fat, too skinny, too something? Hey, if I want you, why would you worry about any of those things? When I want someone, I make sure that they know that. And if I can see that you are a short, skinny, balding guy or a fat, dumpy, woman with gray roots, and I still want you… then you must know that there is something right about you. Because, I don’t pick my partners lightly.

You see, I may be a horn dog, but I’m still selective. People matter. Who they are. Not what they look like. The best blow job I ever had was a girl with so many freckles she was afraid to go out in public for fear of being made fun of. However, the fact that I liked her, her quirky sense of humor, her racy turn of mind, her openness to trying new things, showed her that she was beautiful where it counted. And she was great in the sack. Best blow job I ever had. Uhh, I said that already, didn’t I? Sorry.

Don’t ever think that who you are is meaningless. I don’t happen to think that’s true. And you can scoff all you like and say that it’s easy for me to say that when I’m young and talented and good looking and people want me. Just because I am those things doesn’t mean I couldn’t have self doubts. I appreciate people who think and live and feel. So don’t sell yourself short and hide in your house because you’re not one of the pretty people. Some of us out here don’t measure people that way. Your odds of me wanting to fuck you are just as good as the other guy’s. Or girl’s. I’m an equal opportunity kind of guy, ya know.

So look. I don’t wanna hear about the things you think you aren’t, or the things you think you can’t be, or even the things that you truly aren’t. I want to know who and what you ARE. In the now. In the moment. All those sexual fantasies you have bottled up inside you? Bring ’em on! Let’s give them a go! Don’t be afraid. If I like you, I like you. Which generally means I’ll fuck you. Grab my ass like it’s a piece of your life and let’s get on this rollercoaster ride cause there is no time like the present for having some fun.

This is too philosophical for you, isn’t it? You’re just used to me just getting my rocks off. Well, I like getting my rocks off, but I wanted you all to know that you have value. I’d fuck you. Really. And I don’t say that lightly despite what you may have heard… or read. I gotta work on my rep a little, I guess. Maybe this guest posting thing will help. Ya think?