Really Bad

I’m writing this Sunday night because I have to get up at 5 am to get ready to take Nikki to school. Sometimes I don’t have the time to deal with the blog while I’m on this schedule.

Anyway, I’m really bad. I can’t breathe. I feel like I’m suffocating. My chest burns and my inhalers are not helping.

Why? you ask.

The answer is simple. Because people are selfish. Actually, smokers are selfish.

The stupid tubes of tobacco have been proven bad for people yet there are those who still light them up.  They don’t care if it kills them. They also don’t care if it kills me.

As an asthmatic I’ve learned that every breath is precious. Yet here I sit, lightheaded from lack of oxygen, my meds working OT but doing nothing. All because there is a smoker at the front of my house and others outside my window and all the air I breathe is polluted with their selfishness.

I live in an old condo. It doesn’t have central air. It has an ancient wall unit in the dining room at the floor level. Two summers ago the painters painted over the outside of it when they painted the building and it’s never worked the same since. The condo sits over the building’s two garages. The dryers for all four condos in the building vent INSIDE the garage. And the Asian family in the condo next to mine do laundry 24/7.

In the summer, the heat in my house is impossible. I must have fans on and the windows open. My neighbors have been moving all weekend, standing beneath my bedroom window to smoke their cigs. Rott has been pissed off all weekend so he’s not gone completely outside to smoke. He’s standing (or sitting) at the open front door. And even if he did go outside on the front balcony, the way the fans and the wind around here works, it would still get sucked back to my bedroom where I work.

The result is that I’m seriously fucked when it comes to being able to breathe.  I just want to run away to someplace where there is untainted air. Where my every breath doesn’t feel strangled in my lungs. The frustration and the fear is overwhelming. Can you imagine how you would feel if you had a pillow on your face all day? That is me trying to breathe while being surrounded by smokers.

Nikki will be checking on me to ensure I don’t have any issues once I pass out, er go to sleep. Hopefully, it will get better now that the neighbors seem to be done for the night. They’re a selfish lot on a lot of levels, but you prolly remember the parking wars post. Oy.

Anyway, here’s a Marcus for today and then I have some exciting news about Tuesday!

Oh, he is so yummeh. *sigh*

Anyway, tomorrow there will be a special Sunlight Sucks post! Authors Mandy M. Roth and Michelle M. Pillow will be here talking about vampires and their books.  I hope you will stop by and show them some comment love.

Wishing you a breath of fresh air Monday!

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36 Responses to Really Bad

  1. Ann Campbell says:

    Winter, I feel your pain. I grew up with a heavy smoker…AND she was asmatic 🙂 I began smoking at 17. I have quit several times only to begin again HOWEVER I have always felt that all smokers should be very concious of those around them and where their habit is wafting. Just because I choose to smoke doesn’t mean that I should cause discomfort to others.

    Heck, when people come to my home even for outdoor BBQ’s I am always aware of where they are in relation to me while I decide to light up.

    Smokers have a responsability, just like thse who choose to drink, that or habbit or pleasure should not affect others. Don’t drink and drive…Don’t subject non-smokers and kids to your second hand smoke 🙂 It’s not that hard to do.

    Recently in an attept to really kick the habbit I purchased an electronic cig. Even with what I had to pay for the darn thing I figured out that since I wasn’t buying packs anymore I would have the darn thing paid off in less than 4 months and it is much cheaper for me. No smell, no smoke and I still get my fix. Maybe not the perfect solution but I feel better about it 🙂

    I wish that your neighbors were more respectful with their habbit. If they keep it up I would say something. It is your right to breathe clean air the same as it it theirs to char their lungs. But since their habbit can and does affect others they should take that into consideration. Unfortunatly not all smokers are nice about it. Turds 🙂

    • Winter says:

      Ann – I just saw those electronic cigs yesterday. Interesting concept! Yeah, my neighbors suck. But then a lot of people do these days, unfortunately.

  2. Ann Campbell says:

    Winter, I feel your pain. I grew up with a heavy smoker…AND she was asmatic 🙂 I began smoking at 17. I have quit several times only to begin again HOWEVER I have always felt that all smokers should be very concious of those around them and where their habit is wafting. Just because I choose to smoke doesn’t mean that I should cause discomfort to others.

    Heck, when people come to my home even for outdoor BBQ’s I am always aware of where they are in relation to me while I decide to light up.

    Smokers have a responsability, just like thse who choose to drink, that or habbit or pleasure should not affect others. Don’t drink and drive…Don’t subject non-smokers and kids to your second hand smoke 🙂 It’s not that hard to do.

    Recently in an attept to really kick the habbit I purchased an electronic cig. Even with what I had to pay for the darn thing I figured out that since I wasn’t buying packs anymore I would have the darn thing paid off in less than 4 months and it is much cheaper for me. No smell, no smoke and I still get my fix. Maybe not the perfect solution but I feel better about it 🙂

    I wish that your neighbors were more respectful with their habbit. If they keep it up I would say something. It is your right to breathe clean air the same as it it theirs to char their lungs. But since their habbit can and does affect others they should take that into consideration. Unfortunatly not all smokers are nice about it. Turds 🙂

    • Winter says:

      Ann – I just saw those electronic cigs yesterday. Interesting concept! Yeah, my neighbors suck. But then a lot of people do these days, unfortunately.

  3. Laura says:

    I’m sorry! I smoke but I do it outside ( I have kids ). I never smoke in the car. I have friends who don’t smoke and if we go somewhere, even if it’s all day, I just leave my smokes at home so they don’t have to deal with my bad habit. I’d have gone out there and explained to them and if that didn’t work, yelled. I used to date a guy who smoked for the year I quit. He was rude about it until I kept taking his cigarettes from his lips and snapping them in half when he tried to smoke around me. LOL! He stopped being rude after it got costly do it around me. LOL. I hope you feel better!

  4. Laura says:

    I’m sorry! I smoke but I do it outside ( I have kids ). I never smoke in the car. I have friends who don’t smoke and if we go somewhere, even if it’s all day, I just leave my smokes at home so they don’t have to deal with my bad habit. I’d have gone out there and explained to them and if that didn’t work, yelled. I used to date a guy who smoked for the year I quit. He was rude about it until I kept taking his cigarettes from his lips and snapping them in half when he tried to smoke around me. LOL! He stopped being rude after it got costly do it around me. LOL. I hope you feel better!

  5. Dave2 says:

    I am in a similar situation. The complex here is non-smoking. But smokers can get a unit if they pinky-swear not to smoke IN the unit. So they smoke outside… either right under my air conditioner intake, or under my open bedroom window… which, as you know, is almost the same as if they were smoking in my home.

    But there’s nothing I can do, so me and my allergies just hang in there the best I can. 🙁

    • Winter says:

      Dave – It’s awful isn’t it? Last night smoke from the neighbor’s back patio came right into our living room window and they had cheroots. It made even Rott choke. No one seems to care if their smoke gives the rest of us cancer. It’s really sad that in a world that send can people to a space station that there is nothing we can do about people polluting the air of our personal space.

  6. Dave2 says:

    I am in a similar situation. The complex here is non-smoking. But smokers can get a unit if they pinky-swear not to smoke IN the unit. So they smoke outside… either right under my air conditioner intake, or under my open bedroom window… which, as you know, is almost the same as if they were smoking in my home.

    But there’s nothing I can do, so me and my allergies just hang in there the best I can. 🙁

    • Winter says:

      Dave – It’s awful isn’t it? Last night smoke from the neighbor’s back patio came right into our living room window and they had cheroots. It made even Rott choke. No one seems to care if their smoke gives the rest of us cancer. It’s really sad that in a world that send can people to a space station that there is nothing we can do about people polluting the air of our personal space.

  7. Winter says:

    Margaret – That’s what my blog is for! I whine, I complain, I vent…and I let it go. Besides. I’m breathing okay today and I bought Rott incense. His favorite, one I really like, and one we both like. The house smells all sweet tonight. 🙂

    Kathy – It was a sucky night last night but today is much better!

    Blake – I ALWAYS have issues with assholes! LOL Oh, and stalking the Marcus requires a trip to Manhattan…

    Darah – I share Marcus every Monday. It’s rare for me to miss because how can a Monday be all bad with that hotness to look at?

    Janice – The dust in these parts (I’m literally next to a freeway) is so bad we’ve killed a couple of air purifiers and a bunch of fans!

    Sarah – Nothing makes a day better than Blake’s kisses from the south! 🙂

  8. Winter says:

    Margaret – That’s what my blog is for! I whine, I complain, I vent…and I let it go. Besides. I’m breathing okay today and I bought Rott incense. His favorite, one I really like, and one we both like. The house smells all sweet tonight. 🙂

    Kathy – It was a sucky night last night but today is much better!

    Blake – I ALWAYS have issues with assholes! LOL Oh, and stalking the Marcus requires a trip to Manhattan…

    Darah – I share Marcus every Monday. It’s rare for me to miss because how can a Monday be all bad with that hotness to look at?

    Janice – The dust in these parts (I’m literally next to a freeway) is so bad we’ve killed a couple of air purifiers and a bunch of fans!

    Sarah – Nothing makes a day better than Blake’s kisses from the south! 🙂

  9. Sarah Ballew says:

    Sorry to hear about your affliction. It does suck to be around smoke when you dont want to be. So glad I quit before I got pregnant. My 2 yr old is happy and healthy and I do not miss that nasty habit!! You could spray the friends area while he is standing there on the cusp of the household. Most guys cant stand the smell of some floral spray esp aimed right at them. Not sure what you could use that wouldnt have an effect on you, but it might get your point across. Maybe dump some water out the window and say “oops, thought I smelled fire”.

    Good Luck with everything and thanks for the great eye candy! Loved Blakes post!!

  10. Sarah Ballew says:

    Sorry to hear about your affliction. It does suck to be around smoke when you dont want to be. So glad I quit before I got pregnant. My 2 yr old is happy and healthy and I do not miss that nasty habit!! You could spray the friends area while he is standing there on the cusp of the household. Most guys cant stand the smell of some floral spray esp aimed right at them. Not sure what you could use that wouldnt have an effect on you, but it might get your point across. Maybe dump some water out the window and say “oops, thought I smelled fire”.

    Good Luck with everything and thanks for the great eye candy! Loved Blakes post!!

  11. Hi Lex,

    My dad smoked when I was a tiny preemie baby, so I have asthma and it went undiagnosed for decades. Old doctors, small town. *sigh*

    I have mild asthma and manage mostly without an inhaler, but I do probably need one again. The air in the San Joaquin Valley, where I live, is awful this time of the year with the harvest season going into full swing. Tractors and harvest equipment are churning up dust clouds left and right. My house is so dusty that with my allergies and asthma–I’m screwed!

    I’ve had a few attacks already, so I know about that pillow over the face feeling. It’s awful. And I can’t stand to be around smokers. either. It brings on an attack quicker than anything else.

    One of the things that I’ve tried and works pretty well is getting an air purifier. It’ll clean the air and allow you to breath easier.

    Janice~

  12. Hi Lex,

    My dad smoked when I was a tiny preemie baby, so I have asthma and it went undiagnosed for decades. Old doctors, small town. *sigh*

    I have mild asthma and manage mostly without an inhaler, but I do probably need one again. The air in the San Joaquin Valley, where I live, is awful this time of the year with the harvest season going into full swing. Tractors and harvest equipment are churning up dust clouds left and right. My house is so dusty that with my allergies and asthma–I’m screwed!

    I’ve had a few attacks already, so I know about that pillow over the face feeling. It’s awful. And I can’t stand to be around smokers. either. It brings on an attack quicker than anything else.

    One of the things that I’ve tried and works pretty well is getting an air purifier. It’ll clean the air and allow you to breath easier.

    Janice~

  13. Darah Lace says:

    Well, who can breathe when looking at that hottie? Seriously though, sorry about the asthma and the lack of a/c. That totally sucks! Thanks for sharing the babe!

  14. Darah Lace says:

    Well, who can breathe when looking at that hottie? Seriously though, sorry about the asthma and the lack of a/c. That totally sucks! Thanks for sharing the babe!

  15. Winter and Blake, I will happily join you in the lickfest! Marcus Schenkenburg is my favorite model/hottie. http://marcusschenkenberg.org/ is his personal site.

    Okay, two things…

    The name of the blog and the motto are killer. Just killer! I fell out laughing at those.

    The issue you have with smokers is why there are so many laws to control the spread of smoke now. They are good laws. When you think about what came first, clean air or smoke-filled air, clean air dominated the planet for millenia. Humans messed it up with pollution. As human beings, we have the right to expect unpolluted air. Don’t apologize, Winter. Your neighbors and others who do such things without thought to others are, as you said, selfish. And assholes, plain and simple. Avoidance isn’t possible for you, but you might be able to work around it.

    Inexpensive air purifiers can help. There are desktop models that you can keep close to you. Here’s a link for some other tips. http://tinyurl.com/3x3fvzw I googled “reduce smoke smell” and found a lot of ideas. This link is for just one of them.

    Nothing will replace common courtesy, but since those around you seem to be in short supply, you’re stuck with being proactive. Protect yourself as much as you can. Both my parents died from smoking-related diseases, and I am thankful I never had the inclination to start. I’m currently eight years younger than my mother was when she died. Accidents notwithstanding, I hope to live far beyond that age.

    Wishing you health and happiness!

    • Winter says:

      Kayelle – Thanks for the good wishes! I’m a long time Marcus fan and I welcome fellow droolers! Glad you like my little personal space here. 🙂 Wish I could take credit for the name and tagline but those were given to me by a couple of blogger friends.

  16. Winter and Blake, I will happily join you in the lickfest! Marcus Schenkenburg is my favorite model/hottie. http://marcusschenkenberg.org/ is his personal site.

    Okay, two things…

    The name of the blog and the motto are killer. Just killer! I fell out laughing at those.

    The issue you have with smokers is why there are so many laws to control the spread of smoke now. They are good laws. When you think about what came first, clean air or smoke-filled air, clean air dominated the planet for millenia. Humans messed it up with pollution. As human beings, we have the right to expect unpolluted air. Don’t apologize, Winter. Your neighbors and others who do such things without thought to others are, as you said, selfish. And assholes, plain and simple. Avoidance isn’t possible for you, but you might be able to work around it.

    Inexpensive air purifiers can help. There are desktop models that you can keep close to you. Here’s a link for some other tips. http://tinyurl.com/3x3fvzw I googled “reduce smoke smell” and found a lot of ideas. This link is for just one of them.

    Nothing will replace common courtesy, but since those around you seem to be in short supply, you’re stuck with being proactive. Protect yourself as much as you can. Both my parents died from smoking-related diseases, and I am thankful I never had the inclination to start. I’m currently eight years younger than my mother was when she died. Accidents notwithstanding, I hope to live far beyond that age.

    Wishing you health and happiness!

    • Winter says:

      Kayelle – Thanks for the good wishes! I’m a long time Marcus fan and I welcome fellow droolers! Glad you like my little personal space here. 🙂 Wish I could take credit for the name and tagline but those were given to me by a couple of blogger friends.

  17. Blake Deveraux says:

    OHHHH and one final thing. WHEN you find out where that delicious man is, (his name just sounds sinful to say, Marcus, mmmmmm….) wow is it hot in here? Oh yeah, when you find out where we can tackle the big galoot, I’m in the posse, we can pour honey all over him and you’ll forget alllll about the smokers.

    Kisses.

  18. Blake Deveraux says:

    OHHHH and one final thing. WHEN you find out where that delicious man is, (his name just sounds sinful to say, Marcus, mmmmmm….) wow is it hot in here? Oh yeah, when you find out where we can tackle the big galoot, I’m in the posse, we can pour honey all over him and you’ll forget alllll about the smokers.

    Kisses.

  19. Blake Deveraux says:

    Darling…
    I can understand your frustration. As someone who USED to enjoy every single puff of a delicious tasty cigarette… I also understand the desire to inhale deeply. You unfortunately find yourself in one of the few vestiges of free market. Smokers are now relegated in many cities to treating their habit as a secret diabolical underground deed. As for your neighbors, it sucks to have shitty neighbors, as I can relate, but the fact that the person you live with isn’t particularly interested in your ability to breathe… One would think HE”D be a bit more sensitive.

    In the area I live in, I own a restaurant. IF I wanted to to smoke (which I don’t but…) and I were to do so, in the privacy of my little tiny office, I COULD BE ARRESTED! okay, I agree, the days in which smokers leaned over your shoulder in an elevator exhaling into your nostrils were certainly NOT the glory days. I also would say that I personally quit smoking, not because it was healthy, or the right thing (sad to say but true), but because it made my clothes smell and cost a mint. But surely there is SOME common ground somewhere between having to suffocate on a flight because your trapped in a tube hurdling 700mph with “smoky the asshole”, and having to treat the habit like a crack addiction… In a sense I understand why some smokers are growing angry. It does seem there are a few groups it’s okay to hate… and at one time, I’ve fit into most of them, I’ve just lost weight since then, and quit smoking… the other categories, I’m not so fortunate to be able to just change, so I’ll just go on, hoping the universe eventually catches up.

    My final thought is this, talk to the neighbors, (although if you’re already having WWIII over parking, they probably are HOPING to kill you through smoke… So that may not help.) If not, I submit you don’t have an issue with smokers… You have an issue with assholes, and baby, come sit next to me… We need to talk.

    Kisses from the FORMERLY smoke friendly south,
    Blake

  20. Blake Deveraux says:

    Darling…
    I can understand your frustration. As someone who USED to enjoy every single puff of a delicious tasty cigarette… I also understand the desire to inhale deeply. You unfortunately find yourself in one of the few vestiges of free market. Smokers are now relegated in many cities to treating their habit as a secret diabolical underground deed. As for your neighbors, it sucks to have shitty neighbors, as I can relate, but the fact that the person you live with isn’t particularly interested in your ability to breathe… One would think HE”D be a bit more sensitive.

    In the area I live in, I own a restaurant. IF I wanted to to smoke (which I don’t but…) and I were to do so, in the privacy of my little tiny office, I COULD BE ARRESTED! okay, I agree, the days in which smokers leaned over your shoulder in an elevator exhaling into your nostrils were certainly NOT the glory days. I also would say that I personally quit smoking, not because it was healthy, or the right thing (sad to say but true), but because it made my clothes smell and cost a mint. But surely there is SOME common ground somewhere between having to suffocate on a flight because your trapped in a tube hurdling 700mph with “smoky the asshole”, and having to treat the habit like a crack addiction… In a sense I understand why some smokers are growing angry. It does seem there are a few groups it’s okay to hate… and at one time, I’ve fit into most of them, I’ve just lost weight since then, and quit smoking… the other categories, I’m not so fortunate to be able to just change, so I’ll just go on, hoping the universe eventually catches up.

    My final thought is this, talk to the neighbors, (although if you’re already having WWIII over parking, they probably are HOPING to kill you through smoke… So that may not help.) If not, I submit you don’t have an issue with smokers… You have an issue with assholes, and baby, come sit next to me… We need to talk.

    Kisses from the FORMERLY smoke friendly south,
    Blake

  21. Kathy Otten says:

    My brother has asthma, so I have an idea what you go through. Sorry you’ve had such a bad day.

  22. Kathy Otten says:

    My brother has asthma, so I have an idea what you go through. Sorry you’ve had such a bad day.

  23. My husband and I were smokers. Untill he had two heart attacks and 7 strokes, caused by arterial sclerosis, caused by smoking. My mother, niece suffer from asthma. it’s no joke to feel like you can’t breathe. Have a whine. Get it over with and be happy again. Life is too short for us to spare a thought to the selfish people in the world.

  24. My husband and I were smokers. Untill he had two heart attacks and 7 strokes, caused by arterial sclerosis, caused by smoking. My mother, niece suffer from asthma. it’s no joke to feel like you can’t breathe. Have a whine. Get it over with and be happy again. Life is too short for us to spare a thought to the selfish people in the world.

  25. Winter says:

    Metal Mom – Yeah, closing the windows helps a lot. Plus, I think the neighbors are moving out. I’m hoping that’s true cause it would get rid of 1/3 of the parking wars idiots.

  26. Winter says:

    Metal Mom – Yeah, closing the windows helps a lot. Plus, I think the neighbors are moving out. I’m hoping that’s true cause it would get rid of 1/3 of the parking wars idiots.

  27. metalmom says:

    I am a former pack-a -day smoker. Now, I find myself getting pissed off when Hubs smokes. He won’t smoke in his car. He keeps his smoking limited to his office, but once done, he leaves the door open! Or he lights up in there, walks through the hall and living room and out the front door to smoke outside! He makes me nuts. I never realized how bad it smells or clings to things. I can’t imagine how it is for you. I hope I never have to experience it. My mom never had asthma until she was in her 50’s and now can’t be near it.

    I hope your neighbors ease up. (Although it doesn’t sound like it.) At least winter is coming and maybe your windows will be closed more?

  28. metalmom says:

    I am a former pack-a -day smoker. Now, I find myself getting pissed off when Hubs smokes. He won’t smoke in his car. He keeps his smoking limited to his office, but once done, he leaves the door open! Or he lights up in there, walks through the hall and living room and out the front door to smoke outside! He makes me nuts. I never realized how bad it smells or clings to things. I can’t imagine how it is for you. I hope I never have to experience it. My mom never had asthma until she was in her 50’s and now can’t be near it.

    I hope your neighbors ease up. (Although it doesn’t sound like it.) At least winter is coming and maybe your windows will be closed more?