Freakshow

I’m a little burned out this Friday. Way too much shit coming down in different areas of my life. I seriously need to use up some of those vacation hours that I keep stockpiling. So, in the freakshow that is my life, I first give you a story about my kid and a penis. Oh, wait. Heh. Here’s the real intro:

I’m guest blogging at Bluepaintred! (I’m not w00ting out of deference to Karl, who says w00t is not a word. Of course, it’s not, Karl. It’s a sound. Like MEH.)

Next, I have for you the Slogan thing that Dave did. Mine, in keeping with the theme of my life, was… freaky.


Your Slogan Should Be


Winter; What You’d Eat if You Lived on Mars

Next up is something I cannot even articulate. It pisses me off and raises my blood pressure. I’m sure you will find this amusing. I look at it and want to strangle my teenager.

Another thing in the freakshow of my life is that my damned back still hurts. In fact, I’m starting to feel like my left hip is out of whack. Then I remember falling out of the shower onto that hip about 4 years ago. I have a keloid on the hip now from that fall. But it really feels out of whack. Oh, and the doctor I loved so much… came back to work after having a baby and dismissed me. ME! I have no doctor now. My asthma and I feel like crying. I mean, her name was American. She spoke English without an accent. She had a surfboard on the wall of her office. I feel abandoned.

I’m depressed. I want to spend money I don’t have. And everyone’s blog made me smile tonight. Except Jason X’s. I actually laughed at his. Okay, maybe I chuckled at Diesel’s soda badger. But nothing has made me really really laugh since Fab posted the mummy with the caption I Can Has Moisturizer? And even freakier than that, this is my favorite LOL:

Last night, I gave Jester 3/4’s of my hotties. What was I thinking? Now, we’ll be posting the same guys! Okay, I saved some good ones for myself. After all, I love them more than he does. I think. Shit. I think I got the pics off some gay guy’s site. So maybe Jester does love hotties more than me. All gay men seem to have the best hotties on their sites. But do they have… Ian Somerhalder? I think not! HA!


And speaking of hotties, Hilly’s car just might get supplanted in my heart. Turnbaby’s car is THUD. Oh, how I love the smell of octane in the morning… Injected engines full throttle on a long stretch of open highway. Just not the one where James Dean died. I’ve seen the weird ass monument to him out there in the middle of nothing. It’s a piece of silver metal wrapped around a tree. It’s insulting if you think about how he died.

Freaky might be my life at the moment, but if you haven’t seen Matt’s Pope hat, check it out. He was way hotter than Benny and I spent more time on his site this morning than I did watching Benny’s mass. And if the Pope hat is too reverent for you, best go look at Hellohahanarf’s first Half Nekkid Thursday. I have never seen a woman so happy to hold her feet in the air when the camera was rolling. I know it’s not her most recent blog post, but shit. All of her posts are worth reading and this one is worth ogling. Heh.

I think there was something else I was gonna talk about in this freakshow that is my life, but I can’t remember what it is. So you will just have to live with this fucked up post. How bad can it be anyway? It doesn’t have a fake naked Hermione or Harry Potter’s real foreskin. No one but Avitable could post that anyway. I don’t eat or drink when I visit his site. I’d go broke replacing monitors if I did. Wait. I already am broke.

Now, that I’ve pimped and ass kissed my way through a freakshow of a Friday post, here’s a song for you since I didn’t have one this past Tuesday. I wonder if you will get the irony of it… Oh, and BTW, if I didn’t pimp you out today, remind me that I owe you a toe licking or something if we ever meet.

Okay, I’m outta here. I’m going to bed with Anderson Cooper. Hopefully, I’ll get to sleep before Lou Dobbs comes on. He’s not nearly as good a bed partner as Anderson. Happy Freakshow Friday peoples!

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0 Responses to Freakshow

  1. Turnbaby says:

    Well thank you sugar–if we ever get in the same vicinity we’ll take Belle for a spin.

  2. Turnbaby says:

    Well thank you sugar–if we ever get in the same vicinity we’ll take Belle for a spin.

  3. Winter says:

    Susan – I knew you’d get a kick out of that. In fact, when I saw what the slogan generator spit out, you were the first person I thought of!

  4. Winter says:

    Susan – I knew you’d get a kick out of that. In fact, when I saw what the slogan generator spit out, you were the first person I thought of!

  5. Susan Helene Gottfried says:

    *snort*

    What you’d eat if you lived on Mars?

    Whatever I talked the Tour Manager into cooking, of course!

    *grin*

    Sorry. Still on sleep deprivation and the adrenaline high from RT.

  6. Susan Helene Gottfried says:

    *snort*

    What you’d eat if you lived on Mars?

    Whatever I talked the Tour Manager into cooking, of course!

    *grin*

    Sorry. Still on sleep deprivation and the adrenaline high from RT.

  7. Winter says:

    Hello – I’m always happy to have my feet in the air, but the need to turn on the camera during those moments has so far eluded me. Probably because I don’t drink anymore. Heh. I’m not saying anything about the years when I did drink. I plead the 5th there.

  8. Winter says:

    Hello – I’m always happy to have my feet in the air, but the need to turn on the camera during those moments has so far eluded me. Probably because I don’t drink anymore. Heh. I’m not saying anything about the years when I did drink. I plead the 5th there.

  9. hello haha narf says:

    oh man, back pain is a bear. i sure do hate that for you.

    (don’t even say that you haven’t been happy to have your feet in the air when the camera is rolling! hehe)

  10. hello haha narf says:

    oh man, back pain is a bear. i sure do hate that for you.

    (don’t even say that you haven’t been happy to have your feet in the air when the camera is rolling! hehe)

  11. Winter says:

    Tempest – Ohhh heavy lifting… THAT kind I would be up for!

    Karl – I said it was a sound! Hee hee. I promise to try never to use it around you. I respect you and your phallus so I’ll be good.

    Mary – You always make me laugh! I wouldn’t ship you one of those kittens. They are the spawn of the DEVIL (Neko)! They are bound to be trouble…

    Marty – They are all names worthy of knowing. They have broadened my bloggy horizons a hundredfold. And they always make me spray my coffee or Diet Dr Pepper.

    Shiny – Maybe a couple of days off soon. I like the cushion those days give me. I don’t want to use them and then get sick or fired and need them.

    Hilly – It’s been a slow thing, which is odd. It’s never done this before. And the hip does feel weird. I dunno. I guess I need to find a new doctor whose English i can understand and have the hip looked at. The ride… would be awesome. I should really think about trading my Intrepid for a used Charger but I don’t want a payment! Wahhhh!

    Thanks to everyone for stopping by and commenting!

  12. Winter says:

    Tempest – Ohhh heavy lifting… THAT kind I would be up for!

    Karl – I said it was a sound! Hee hee. I promise to try never to use it around you. I respect you and your phallus so I’ll be good.

    Mary – You always make me laugh! I wouldn’t ship you one of those kittens. They are the spawn of the DEVIL (Neko)! They are bound to be trouble…

    Marty – They are all names worthy of knowing. They have broadened my bloggy horizons a hundredfold. And they always make me spray my coffee or Diet Dr Pepper.

    Shiny – Maybe a couple of days off soon. I like the cushion those days give me. I don’t want to use them and then get sick or fired and need them.

    Hilly – It’s been a slow thing, which is odd. It’s never done this before. And the hip does feel weird. I dunno. I guess I need to find a new doctor whose English i can understand and have the hip looked at. The ride… would be awesome. I should really think about trading my Intrepid for a used Charger but I don’t want a payment! Wahhhh!

    Thanks to everyone for stopping by and commenting!

  13. Hilly says:

    I hope your back starts to feel better! I promise…a ride in my car, once I’m done with the nasties!

  14. Hilly says:

    I hope your back starts to feel better! I promise…a ride in my car, once I’m done with the nasties!

  15. rxvenomqueen says:

    I love those LOL Cats. They’re downright funny. It’s shitty when Friday rolls around and you reflect on the week, thinking how life has handed you nothing but shit every single day so far. Seems like when it rains, it pours. Weeks like these can really dampen the spirit. But things will get better, chicky. I do think you need to take some time off. Taking a nice breather from work just might be your ticket to getting some of the things you need and want. 🙂 If only I can convince you to take a day off now like I had in the past.

  16. rxvenomqueen says:

    I love those LOL Cats. They’re downright funny. It’s shitty when Friday rolls around and you reflect on the week, thinking how life has handed you nothing but shit every single day so far. Seems like when it rains, it pours. Weeks like these can really dampen the spirit. But things will get better, chicky. I do think you need to take some time off. Taking a nice breather from work just might be your ticket to getting some of the things you need and want. 🙂 If only I can convince you to take a day off now like I had in the past.

  17. martymankins says:

    Since I’ve started adding all of these blogs to read, I’m becoming more familar with all of the names you linked to in the post.

  18. martymankins says:

    Since I’ve started adding all of these blogs to read, I’m becoming more familar with all of the names you linked to in the post.

  19. MaryO says:

    Poor winter!! If I was there I woudl come over and help make you laugh. The kittens are cute though. No I dont want one.
    If you read my post you will understand why I am bumming today. Plus it is raining a little so it is a BLAH kind of day. Hope you have a good weekend.

  20. MaryO says:

    Poor winter!! If I was there I woudl come over and help make you laugh. The kittens are cute though. No I dont want one.
    If you read my post you will understand why I am bumming today. Plus it is raining a little so it is a BLAH kind of day. Hope you have a good weekend.

  21. Karl says:

    Yeah, quite the freakshow around the Net right now. And that word is NOT a word. I don’t even want to say it. Ugh.

    i’D sOoNeR tYp LiK tHiS.

  22. Karl says:

    Yeah, quite the freakshow around the Net right now. And that word is NOT a word. I don’t even want to say it. Ugh.

    i’D sOoNeR tYp LiK tHiS.

  23. Tempest Knight says:

    Sorry to hear about your backache! Take it easy for a while, and don’t do any heavy lifting. You know how heavy those sexy men are. *winks*

  24. Tempest Knight says:

    Sorry to hear about your backache! Take it easy for a while, and don’t do any heavy lifting. You know how heavy those sexy men are. *winks*